Saturday, March 31, 2007

This is what it sounds like when doves cry.

The other night I covered myself under the blankets and let some of springs brisk air creep in through the make shift cat door I made for Bey.Now remember our cast of characters as we go along. This is Bey. He's my cat. He's indoor/outdoor . I made his cat door from cardboard and black duct tape where normally an air conditioner expansion would be.

So I'm snuggling in. Bey bolts in through the window cat door as he usually does. I hear him off in the kitchen crunching some dry food and then I hear something I'd never noticed before at night. He was... Playing. It seemed he was playing with some of the cat toys. I was elated that Mister Tomcat was actually indoors playing with cat toys. With that, I smiled and drifted off to slumberland.

I get up the next day... Lumbering from the bed bleary eyed, I make my way to grap a paper plate and a can of Fancy Feast. I'm having a sleepwalking moment. I continue to dress and go of to work. Nothing alarming
yet... so off to work I go.

I come home the next day. I listen to the meow of the hungry beast. I bend down to get his can of food. Still oblivious, I go off to plate it, feed him and go on about my business.

After I change my clothes, hit send and receive on my email, I decide to go to the Tassimo and make myself a double cup of Joe. Then I look down an think to myself... "I know I should've mopped the kitchen this weekend, but where did all these dust bunnies come from. Then I notices those aren't dust bunnies....

They're feathers. As I look over to the right I see a peach and gray colored dove, natures beauty pageant queen of the pigeon world, expired on the kitchen floor.




That's when it hit me as to what I heard him batting around the night before. He had been playing kitchen hockey with a corpse all the night before and I wasn't noticing it until now.

This was when the screaming started."WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!?!?!!?"

Now mind you, he ate and left. I'm running around ranting about the dead bird on the floor, sending out ICQs about this horror show...and yet all I can think of is Eddie Murphy and that old routine he did about the dead bird.

"Dead biiirrrrrrd...DEEEEAAAAD BIIIIRRD!!! I'm gonna put it on you...Put it ON YOU!!! AAAAAUUUGHH!!!"




Gee. Pets are fun. This sure does beat the mouse he hadn't finished yet killing that he was batting around on my bedroom floor. Next entry: Watch the mojo flow! Previous entry: Chocolate Jesus...My Sweet Lord.

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